A woman asked friends of Reddit’s “AmItheA**hole” forum whether her live-in boyfriend is in the wrong for asking her to change elsewhere while he sleeps.
In the post, the woman explained that her boyfriend is “complaining that [I] make too much noise while getting ready on the morning.” She said their bathroom is connected to the bedroom with “an extra ugly small room” she likened to a “maid’s room.” Her boyfriend asked her to move her clothes to that room to dress every morning but she hesitated, saying she is “uncomfortable with the bathroom of that room” because it’s “very small and ugly.”
The Redditor — who goes by the user name u/SatisfactionRare7422 — added that her boyfriend doesn’t want her to use the main bathroom to shower in the mornings, either. She re-iterated that she doesn’t want to move her things to the other room but feels conflicted.
“He says that he needs to sleep the most he can to do his job well and that his job should be our priority because he provides most of the money,” she wrote. “I think that this is too much but maybe he is right. We have been arguing about this.”
Thus, she reached out to the internet for its collective opinion.
u/mouse_attack said, “The solution for this problem is to break up with the guy. He’s self-absorbed, self-indulgent, entitled, demanding, and thinks it’s appropriate to wield his income as leverage in their relationship. OP, this guy is just a ‘boyfriend from your 20s’. They’re a stopover whose only purpose is to teach you what you shouldn’t put up with.”
Many others echoed the sentiment with u/nuttyNougatty adding, “Not the maid, not the cook and NOT THE ALARM CLOCK. What would he do if you’re not there????”
Recent research from YouGov Omnibus found that four in ten people claim they don’t wake up well-rested and refreshed. Still, commenters focused on the uneven distribution of responsibilities when one partner makes more money.
u/onlyslightlysarcastic said, “he is a capable grown up, and if the only reason to get up before him is to make breakfast for him just don’t.”
One comment by u/sashikku has amassed 3,000 upvotes. “Also, can we talk about the fact that he says an alarm won’t wake him up, but the sounds of her getting ready wake him up??” they wrote. “In what world does that make any sense? If her getting ready wakes him up, he’s been flat out lying about alarms not working for him. Liars don’t deserve someone making their breakfast for them.”
Others didn’t see the issue with switching her things to another room. “A whole room as my dedicated closet/dressing room? yes! sweet lighting, kicking it vibes to get ready to,” u/okbutdidudietho said.
The post has garnered nearly 8,000 upvotes and 1,500 comments over the course of 12 hours. The top comment has upwards of 25,000 upvotes saying, “You are not the maid. Do not allow your partner to treat you like the hired help for one more day. This ends now. I really mean this, OP. You deserve to be treated better than this.”